What Women Want!

Laser Tattoo Removal

Bradford Bulls and England Rugby Star, Stuart Fielden, popped in recently for a treatment to remove part of his Celtic band from his upper arm.

Hydrotherapy

It was advertising colon hydrotherapy, so I decided to do my large intestine a favour and brave the unknown.

Thoughts of Hairman Howard

This week's column is called 'thoughts of Hairman Howard' as I have just returned from the China International Beauty and Hair Exhibtion in Beijing where I was regarded as a giant among men.

Pole Dancing

The pole dancing class was in full swing - but I was banished downstairs as caretaker and security guard while everyone at the sell-out sexercise session laughed away the evening.

A dim of squealing, shouting, cheering, giggling and whooping was all I could hear coming from upstairs in the salon.

Looking After Your Skin

WAS it Joan Rivers who said: "I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin deep. That's deep enough. What do you want - an adorable pancreas?"

In my experience most women are happy with their pancreas; it's their skin that bothers them.

Women Gain the Upper Hand

"MNN yeah mnn mnn yeah yean mnn" is something I say quite often.

Living with a wife, two daughters, a chestnut mare and Tiggy the Leonburger, then coming to work with six other women and female customers is bound to crunch even the toughest male.

Top up your tan

A BEDOUIN 300 miles from the nearest oasis feels very differently about the sun to you and I.

For him sunlight is the enemy and pale women are prized more highly even than camels.

Once upon a time, we in the West also tresured porcelain skin. Rich people showed they were wealthy by staying indoors, while labourers toiled the fields and got a tan.

Turn back the years

You don't need to be a beauty guru to know women want youthful skin that reminds them of petals and babies' cheeks - soft, radiant and smooth.

This yearning is the bottom-line of the beauty business and in recent years has fuelled billion dollar research into new ways of rejuvenating those saggy bits that pile on each birthday.

Hair today - gone tomorrow

Women want to be hairless everywhere but on their heads. That's my conclusion after a lifetime in this business.

And that's also why I'm now a full-time hair remover and not just a hairdresser. I used to cut, colour, set and blow it. Now I just zap it.

A strange profession for a man, perhaps, but one that enables me to heal women of profound embarrassment, shyness and lack of self-esteem.